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Taking

Responsibility

for

Our

Lives

5748

(1987)

It is hard to admit failure and concede guilt. Thus we often blame others for out troubles. While we proudly accept plaudits and take credit for our success, we tend to claim that we are victims of circumstance and to rationalize our failure. Yet upon closer examination it easier to see that we are not victims, we are the chief factors in both our own success and failure.

No matter that many of us feel lucky in our marriage, we know that the maintenance of such a relationship is based less upon chance than our personal input and response. So too, many of us realize that while diplomas allow us to wedge our foot in the work-place door, it is our own on-the-job performance that determines our advancement, or replacement. Blaming, as we often do, the times or other people for our unhappiness or misfortune merely blinds us to our own role in such troubles and the need to confront ourselves if we are to overcome and advance.

We see this truth most clearly in Shakespeare. He realized that life's deepest tragedies are caused by personal action or inaction. While Sophocles and the Greeks of his time could blame the gods and fate for the anguish of their victims, Shakespeare says; "The fault, dear Brutus is not in our stars, but in ourselves." So Hamlet's "To be or not to be" shows how his own hesitancy and Indecision threaten to destroy him. MacBeth is driven by his ambition and Othello, by his jealousy to commit murder. Neither the gods nor our horoscopes have much to do with our destiny. The fault dear Brutus is in ourselves. This is a fundamental law of life.

God gives us responsibility for our own fate. And even more importantly, ever man’s fate is the consequence of his thoughts and deeds. This law is central to Judaism. The most important aspect of living is to resolutely take charge of our own lives and decisively deal with the problems of our own characters.

At this point, some here may be confused. Doesn’t the Bible say: "Am I not my brother’s keeper"? Do we not have responsibility for our brethren? Should we not be concerned with others besides ourselves? Should we have no feelings towards the hungry and the sick? We all know the answer. But, let’s not be glib, or superficial. Most people are far less generous with their friendship, far less involved in civic causes than they care to admit. True, we have social feelings, but they often fall short of action. Everybody was against hunger, but both the Live Aid Concerts and Hands Across America fell far short of their goals and no action. As we celebrate the 25th anniversary of the Peace Corps, we can clearly see that the elemental acts of will in which individuals take decisive charge of their own life and make something worthwhile of it is where world progress is made. Yes, Cain was responsible for his brother, but he would never have had to answer the question which God placed before him had he controlled his own anger and jealousy. For to help others requires grappling with self. Seeing how we know the right and mean to do it is not enough. Reaching within ourselves, confronting our inertia, overcoming our fears of inadequacy, taking charge of ourselves, alone can help us live proudly and at our best.

Secondly, let us realize that decisive dealing with one’s own life begins in our youth, For strength of character is formed with the help of love liberating and not smothering love. I know l am not alone in enjoying biographies of great people whose beginnings were very humble. Few had their own beds let alone their own rooms. Many studied at kitchen tables and attended night school because they had to work by day in order to help their parents and siblings. Now many are very successful. Some, however, try to prove their success by providing their own children with all the creature comforts they never had . They think. being good parents means insulating their "children from confronting responsibility. Some say; "There will be time enough for that." But to a mature mind, knowing the humble breeding places of great ability such well-to-do life styles managed by indulgent parents may not encourage superiority and the struggle to achieve it in their children. The great chapter of American Jewish achievement, to which we all point in pride, as written by Jews born and raised in the humblest of circumstances. Yet, now we see Japanese, Chinese and Korean children excelling and surpassing us in the talent searches, and merit exams both in Science and the Arts, while many of our children are encouraged to spend inordinate amounts of time on the sports fields dreaming of big bucks in meaningless pursuits that end at age 40 if not earlier.

Yet many parents are hesitant to guide our children toward high goals. "What the hurry they say, let them have fun." Youth Is the last fling before entering the real world. That's a delusion. Youth is the time loving parents can help trusting children to prepare for the real world, a world which demands achievement and presents great choices. Let us not let our love blind us from our responsibility to help our children be victorious in life by clearly making decisions about the loyalties and ambitions that matter most because they do not shelter from growth, but rather, inspire each to develop the height and depth of one's mind and soul.

Rather than delude our children into believing that we can endlessly provide and always protect let us face our role in developing self reliance in those we love so dearly. Our task is to develop the ability to learn and do so that they can face life's troubles. And trouble is a challenge we all face. Trouble, born of time's changes and mystery forces us to wrestle with ourselves and make vital decisions. Like Jacob wrestling with his fears, we too, wrestle with disappointment of defeat conflict and temptation. There is none, not torn between doubt and resolve struggling to wrest a blessing out of life, and none can provide the blessing for us. It requires grappling with self end the preparation loved ones provide if we and our youth are to succeed at life's tasks.

Finally, this great problem of taking responsibility for our own life is the age-old religious problem which vitalizes these High Holy Days. It is the relationship of man with his own soul.

These days call upon us to understand what Judaism means b the soul. For a man's soul is his whole invisible personality, the total sum of one's being that thinks, plans, judges and loves. The soul is a man's spiritual life in heights and depths. Happy the man who is helped to plumb his soul when he is young. For youth is the time in which we dream and idealize. Youth is the time we explore our inner life and our spiritual life. That is why some mourn lost youth and all of us love the young. They have opportunities some of us have lost; to quest for life’s spiritual meaning and purpose.

While many cannot verbalize this quest, it is the profound reason so many turn to Temp and God. We recognize our need for partners in the vital task of lifting young eyes to the mountains and helping supple spirits to soar beyond earth. It is the reason we bring our young the Torah, that together, we might forge links to life's highest thoughts and spiritual grandeur. Oh, how good that we here at Beth-el have helped new generations to a rich and resourceful spiritual life.

Burl when youth moves into the "real world" the role of the soul in successful living is often diminished and sometime belittled. When we're busy, ambitious, pre-occupied with making our fortunes, many tend to lose their souls through neglect and maltreatment. What a dangerous gamble. Given fair weather and smooth sailing, we're not in need. When we know the way and the breeze is steady and light, what's the problem? But, when the darkness comes and gales blow, when we're in big trouble and struggling to keep from capsizing, oh how we need our souls. When temptations threaten our honor, when work becomes hated and life itself bitter. Oh my soul -- keep me from quitting, from running and then blaming others.

That's what living Judaism with its _________ and its celebration is all about -- the protection and expansion of the human soul so that we are adequate for life. Then life is not a terror but an adventure of the spirit.

Thus, we come to these days because we have ourselves on our hands and in our own keeping. We know how capable we are of shameful failure. And we know how capable we are of joyous victory. We know through the lives of others how we can turn our fires into living hell, and we know similarly that we have the possibility make our lives outshine the sun. Judaism, in its true greatness, brings each of us to life's central task -- wrestling with ourselves. And Judaism in its splendor gives the power to be successful. The choice is the choice of cowards and failure or the choice of courage and victory. The choice of being ever Jacob, the heel, or Israel the champion, so choose with me. Life and blessing. Faith and vision. Confidence that comes from obedience to historic and fulfilling his _________. We don’t have to blame others, we have to be responsible for our life.

Bless the Lord 0 my soul and let all that is within me bless His Holy name.

Amen.